What she claims to be lacking is the passion, the desire, the chemistry.
We have been processing through this for six months. I fell deeply into the quicksand of inadequacy and introspection to really see where I was out of integrity. I have demonstrated my commitment to the marriage in many ways, from my presence with my family, to creating special time for us to connect. Nothing has shifted for her.
Recently, she took up salsa dancing and found a new source of expression for herself. She “turned on” and it felt good. She also attracted another man, who she was beginning to have an affair with and lied and hid it from me until I discovered an email she wrote to him saying that she couldn’t wait to be in his arms again.”
The affair is over, no infidelity, but it was going there.
Recently, we’ve been discussing the option of a legal separation, but then she gets cold feet.
There is a tremendous amount of back and forth, her coming close to me and wanting me to comfort her, but then her position of not desiring me or thinking that I cannot give her what she needs comes back and we’re right back where we started.
My question is…with my family and my marriage at stake, where do I stand. I don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t desire me. I want love to flow into our lives. But I do love her, desire her, and want to continue building the beautiful life we have.
But it seems for her, this question of desire is a deal breaker and outweighs everything else.
Part of me wants to move on, but I’m pulled back for my love and for the sake of our long term marriage and especially for our children.
Where do I stand powerfully in this situation?”
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